Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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