In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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