Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
