I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Randomize
