Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
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