margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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