i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
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