No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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