he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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