He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
