D3 body, D1 cock
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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