Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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