i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
