It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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