yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
NoShamevember. You game?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
