I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i came on her dog
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
