I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Someone signed my nipple.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
