So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
