Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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