I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize