hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
