Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
