in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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