yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
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