Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
