whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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