Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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