I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
