Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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