sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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