Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize