That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
