eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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