Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
