Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
