She said her name was "party"
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
