Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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