So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
