found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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