guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
