arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
It's just like the Real World with babies
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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