Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
