It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
