everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize