Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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