your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
