I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
