Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize