And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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