i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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