Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
